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The Bossy Spa

Virtual Hugs for Caregivers

Hugs

The blog at the Bossy Spa is a based on a simple idea. People who spend time in care of others need emotional support. The Bossy Spa blog sends out a hug every day in the form of a short love note to comfort and inspire and encourage those giving care. It is that simple.

Philosophy

Giving care to a chronically ill or terminal person is a daunting task, the challenges of which are only just now beginning to be discussed by the healthcare system. Family and friends may not live close or know best how to be supportive. The Bossy Spa fills the gap for people whose loved ones are not able to.

Financial

The Bossy Spa has a goal of being financially self sustaining. Our digital content is free and without advertising. At the suggestion of our readers we are adding an online store, so if you love someone giving care, you can send them a gift that also supports the Bossy Spa.

Store

Our online store is under construction. We plan to offer a few items to start including paper subscriptions to our blog content for caregivers who are not online. We welcome suggestions for other items to offer. Let us know what items would be meaningful to you as a caregiver.

Our Story

My sister’s husband has Alzheimer’s. Once when she came to visit she told me the most burdensome thing about being a caregiver was making every single decision. She had to remember their anniversary, decide what to get for him, decide what he would get for her, and decide how they would celebrate. She was making countless decisions, and she was exhausted.

The caregiver role is relentless. There is not much I can do to make my sister’s life better in a practical way, but when she came to visit I stopped asking her what she wanted. I began to decide everything: what to serve her for breakfast, when she would take a nap, whether we were going to a party, and what kind of tea I would pour for her on the porch. The Bossy Spa was born.

Her husband’s condition now makes it impossible for my sister to travel to visit me at The Bossy Spa. I miss the weekends together where I can give my sister a small break.

I decided to replicate the Bossy Spa online. It cannot be the same kind of nurturing as serving my sister a pot of autumn chai on the porch, but it is something I can do to reach across the miles between us.

Sharing the Bossy Spa with other caregivers was my sister’s idea. She wants others to have access to a virtual hug every day. Caregivers can rest here. There is nothing to do. This is not a place for legal advice, medical updates, or practical nursing tips. There are other places for that sort of thing.

If you have a real sister who lives nearby and can give you an actual hug, visit her. Otherwise, stop by the Bossy Spa for a short break when you have the time.

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Our Team

Deborah

Deborah

Hugs

Deborah writes the daily love notes for caregivers. She takes the photographs and establishes the vision for the Bossy Spa, mostly by asking her sister what to do next.
Mark

Mark

Lifting

Mark lifts all the things that need to be lifted: the firewood, the tractor parts, and the spirits of those around him. He is in charge of the bar and wine cellar, so he lifts those spirits too.
Annie

Annie

Technology

Annie manages the technolody platform at the Bossy Spa. She can be slow to fix things because it takes her time to learn how. She is patient and smart and highly motivated by roasted turkey.
Ginger

Ginger

Walks

Walks are not optional at the Bossy Spa because Ginger is more relentless than any personal trainer. We walk every day because Ginger thinks the whole idea of a weekend is silly.
Barkley

Barkley

Beauty

Barkley is living proof that old age can be beautiful. His mane is showing strands of white, but he could not be more lovely. If you stand by him he grooms your hair with his lips.
Magic

Magic

Serenity

Magic was roughly treated before he came to live at the Bossy Spa. He exudes gratitude and serenity, except when he leaps with joy on cold sunny mornings.